So a policeman is approached by a drunk man... The drunk man says, ""Officer! Someone stole my car!"" The officer asks him, ""Where'd you last see it?"" The drunk man holds up the keychain in his hand and tells him, ""It was right here on the end of this key!"" The officer rolls his eyes and says to the man, ""Okay, well you're gonna have to follow me to the precinct and fill out a report, but before we go you might want to zip up your fly."" The drunk man looks down at his crotch and says, ""Aw…

A drunk man stumbles around downtown.. and he is approached by a cop. The cop says, ""Excuse me sir, where are you going?"" The drunk replies with a slurred ""I'm just looking for my car, but I can't find it. I think someone took it."" ""Well where was the last place you saw it?"" The drunk says ""Right here on the the end of this key"" and hold up his car keys. The cop goes to arrest the man but stops when he notices the drunk's zipper is down. He says ""Sir do you know your fly is down?"" The …

What Not to Say to a Policeman -- I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. -- Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize I was driving. -- Wow, you must've been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! -- I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead. -- You're not gonna check the trunk, are you? -- You look just like my girlfriend's deadbeat ex-husband. -- The question is -- do YOU know why you pulled me over? -- I was trying to keep up with traffic, and it's miles …

A drunk is stumbling down the street, and approaches a cop on duty The drunk says, "Officer, I need your help. Somebody stole my car!" The cops askes, "Where was it when you last saw it?" The drunk replies, holding a silver key, "right on the end of this key." The cop chuckles, and says, "Well, you better head down to the station and fill out the proper forms. They'll help you out." The drunk says, "Ok", and starts to wander off. But before he can get away, the cop calls out to him. "Hey b…