Messi, Ronaldo and Zlatan died in a car crash and goes to heaven. The three walks up to God sitting on his throne. God says: ""Messi, what is the best thing about football?"" Messi bows and answers: ""The best thing about football is that I have been able to spread joy to people, earn money for my living and seeing the world."" God felt it was a good answer when he said: ""Good Messi, come and sit at my left side."" God then looked at Ronaldo and said: ""And you Ronaldo, what is the best thing a…

So Messi, Ronaldo, and Ibrahimovic arrive at the pearly white gates... There to meet them is St. Peter, who informs them that they may pass through but their judgement is to be carried out in front of Jesus. At last they reach Jesus, who says the following... ""Messi my child, you were always good to the poor and those less fortunate. Here, I have a seat on my right hand side for you"" and gestures for Messi to come take a seat. ""Ronaldo my son, though you were at times arrogant your heart is g…

World Cup Jokes Here are my attempts at World cup jokes. Why is Ronaldo always clean shaven? Because he doesn't want to be Messi. Why did Jurgen Klinsmann leave Donovan off of the roster? I do Nazi why he did this. What's light, round & fly's in the air when kicked? Dead babies Why do they call the hardest group, the group of death? Women don't play in the world cup.

Why does C. Ronaldo comb his hair every game break? So it won't get too Messi.