Custody Battle Husband and wife are fighting in divorce court for the custody of their child. The judge asked the mother to make her case as to why she deserves to have custody. The mother puts on a passionate plea and shocks everyone in the court room. When she is done the judge turns to the father and says ""she makes a compelling case and doesn't look like your getting the child but I must give you a chance to speak"" Father knows he is screwed as he is standing up to make his statement, bein…

My favorite joke, courtesy of my buddys dad. (A Newfy is a Newfoundlander, A north eastern Canadian it's interchangeable, just how I heard the joke) A Newfy calls up his lawyer looking for a divorce. The lawyer curious of the circumstances says ""Great! do you have a suit?"" The Newfy replies ""Yup, wears it to church every Sunday."" The lawyer thinking says ""Hmmm, No, Do you have any grounds?"" The Newfy retorts ""Yup, gots me 15 acres."" The lawyer still pondering how to simplify it continues…

Another set of Jewish mom jokes Seeing how my first post had a ~~huuuuge~~ kinda moderate success, here's another set. Because it seems americains are not aware of the jewish mom stereotype, here is a rough translation of the French Wiki : > The typical traits of the jewish mom include : > > * An excessive pride of their son's achievements. They'll always say ""My son, the doctor"" or ""My son, the lawyer"" > * In contrast, a jewish mother won't stop complaining if she estimates her …

A lawyer is meeting the devil to make a deal ... and says, "Alright, I want to win my next 10 cases in a row, for settlements of no less than $1 million!" The Devil replies, "Ok mister lawyer, but in return, I demand the souls of your wife and child for 1000 years!" The lawyer scratches his head and says, "I don't get it, where's the catch?" From my dad.