Putin decreed that all time zones in Russia be unified. After this had occurred, the Prime Minister approached him. *"Dearest Putin, I had a problem. I called my relatives in the east to wish them good night, and they told me they were on the beach enjoying the sun."* *"And then I called my family in Kaliningrad to wish them a happy holiday, and they said the holiday was already over."* *"And then I called Xi Jinping to wish him a happy new year, and he said 'what, it's still the old year'."* Putin nodded his head sympatheticly, saying: *"I, too, have had these kinds of problems. I called Prigozhin's family to offer them condolences, but it turned out we hadn't even killed him yet."*