Goldilocks and the Three Bears (American Football Fans Will Understand) Mama bear and Papa bear are getting a divorce after the fiasco with Goldilocks, but they must decide custody of baby bear. The judge takes baby bear aside, and asks politely, ""Would you like to live with Papa Bear?"" ""No,"" Baby Bear answers, ""Papa Bear beats me!"" ""Oh no."" the judge replies. ""Then you can live with Mama Bear."" ""No!"" Baby Bear exclaims. ""She beats me too!"" ""Oh dear."" Says the judge. ""Well then,…