#ryan-lochte

[high school] Teacher: do u have your homework? Ryan Lochte: I was murdered last night

Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte has to eat enough to feed a family of 4 every day. He has to! I just do it because I feel like it.

BRAZIL: Can you describe your attacker? RYAN LOCHTE: You wouldn't know him. He goes to another Olympics. #LochteGate

What will Ryan Lochte say if he looses ""Dancing With the Stars""? ""I was robbed"" Sorry, that just came to me like a stroke of idiotic genius and I couldn't help myself.

What did Ryan Lochte name his Gold medal? GoldiLochtes

After watching the Olympics, a little boy says to his mom, "When I grow up, I want to be like Ryan Lochte!" She says, "Honey, you can't have it both ways."

Next time you're at the bar, ask the bartender for a Ryan Lochte When the bartender asks you what's in a Ryan Lochte? Just say "I don't know, make something up"

Next time you're at the bar ask the bartender for a Ryan Lochte

What would people call Ryan Lochte if he went to jail? Ryan Locht-up

What do Ryan Lochte and the water in Rio have in common? They're both full of shit.