#mens-room

Instructions in the Men's Room for hand washing. Because non-hand washers can't be bothered unless there's an opportunity to learn stuff.

*At The Opera* Her: Where are you going? Me: I have to go to the Men's Room. Her: I have the car keys. Me: Shit!

BAD: When your date has been in the Men's Room for 45 mins. WORSE: When the 6 yo girl at the table next to you says "he's not coming back"

Winston Churchill enters the Men's room... ... at the House of Commons, and see Clement Attlee, the Head of the Labor Party. Rather than joining Attlee and conversing, Churchill goes to the far end of the piss trough. Attlee says, ""What's the matter Winnie, not feeling sociable today?"" Churchill replies, ""No, it's just that whenever you Socialist boys see something big, you want to nationalize it.""

In the Men's Room In the men's room this morning I was standing next to a very fat fellow at a urinal when suddenly, for no discernible reason, he confided in me that he hadn't seen his pecker in 15 years. Not knowing why he suddenly decided to confide such personal information to a complete stranger, not knowing what else to say and wanting to be helpful, I said..... ""Why don't you diet? Giving me a surprised stare, he said, ""Dye it? For God's sake, what color is it now?""

In the Men's Room, I hate pooping next to others... funny because i enjoy being amongst my peers.

Top Secret Communications Center When my son was in the Air Force, my wife and I visited quite often. On our first visit, we were allowed inside this top secret Communications Center, but everything in sight was covered up so we could look around everywhere -- Heck, even the toilet paper in the Men's room was disguised. Anyway, at the exit, there's a sign above the door, which reads: ""You have been exposed to Top Secret Material. Please destroy yourself before leaving the building.""