The truth about America... A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States . He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, ""Thank you Mr. American for letting me into this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and a free education!"" The passerby says, ""You are mistaken, I am a Mexican."" The man goes on and encounters another passerby. ""Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America ."" The person says, ""I not American, I Vietnamese."" The new arrival walks farther, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, and says, ""Thank you for wonderful America ! That person puts up his hand and says, ""I am from Middle East . I am not American."" He finally sees a nice lady and asks, ""Are you an American?"" She says, ""No, I am from Africa ."" Puzzled, he asks her, ""Where are all the Americans?"" The African lady checks her watch and says, ""Probably at work.""
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My fav sci-fi this year is the Bank of America ad where the 30 year old dude with a new baby has $56k in his checking account.
Morbidlly obese preteens at the nail salon are what's wrong with America.
CAPTAIN AMERICA: *punches guy* Take that villain CAPTAIN BRITAIN: *punches guy* Take that guvnor CAPTAIN CANADA: *punches guy* I am so sorry
Captain America outsources much of his crime fighting to Captain India.
Joke ID:
01KKTNGVPHZTJBPWW5W173GJGX