Phantom energy So, our science teacher was teaching us about phantom energy. At one point of the lesson, he puts his phone on the counter and says; ""If I leave my phone here it will eventually die."" After a little pause I hear another student whisper and say; ""Same with children"".

Computer Science major walks into an English class The Professor says ""Welcome to English 101"". The student panicks. ""What's wrong?"" asks the Professor. ""I missed the first 4 English classes"".

just ran into my high school biology teacher. she said "i figured you'd have cured cancer by now." then i washed bird shit off her tahoe

Had a lot of chemistry with my high-school science teacher.