[final debate] TRUMP: I'd like to apologize to hillary MODERATOR: umm ok HILLARY: umm ok TRUMP: I brought a gift *hands her a galaxy note 7*

[phone rings] "Hello?" Hi, is your refrigerator running? "WTF?" ...well Hillary is! Hi, I'd like to talk to you about the Clinton campaign.

If "six degrees" is true, somebody tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell somebody to tell Scarlett Johansson I said "Hi."

REPUBLICANS: I can't believe Trump won. DEMOCRATS: I can't believe Hillary lost. ME: I can't believe it's not butter!