A guy and his dog go into a bar... ...and the guy sits down at the bar. He orders a beer and drinks it, then orders another. The dog sits patiently at his feet. When it comes time for the guy to pay, he looks the barman in the eye and says, ""I'm afraid I don't have any money."" The barman is about to kick this joker's ass when the guy says, ""But I have something even better. I have a magical dog. He can talk."" This is a new one on the barman, and although he's skeptical, he decides to give th…

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi are all drinking together at a bar. The priest says, ""Okay, guys, I don't mean to brag, but this year alone, I've gotten over a hundred people signed up for RCIA, which is a new record for our parish."" The minister shakes his head. ""Are you kidding me? That's nothing. I've saved over three hundred people in the past year and a half!"" The rabbi simply laughs. ""You guys are pathetic! Attendance rates at our synagogue are at an all-time high, and we're getting…

A JOURNEY FROM MAN TO MONK There was once a man just like me and you. He woke up in the morning, went to work and enjoyed a beer with his friends in the evening. One day the man was walking down an empty street when a young man jumped at him with a knife, stabbed him and took his money. The man thought surely he would die as he lay on the ground bleeding. But then out of nowhere a monk appeared. The monk pocked him up and carried him away. Soon after the man lost consciousness, but when he awoke…

Travelling salesman walks into a bar in a one horse town... After a few drinks he approaches the bartender... ""Barkeep! I need a woman"". Bartender says ""sorry Mac, the best I can do for you is Singaloo, the cook"". Guy spits back ""I don't go for that shit!"" And sits down again. Few more drinks he goes back to the bartender: ""look, if money is the problem I'll take care of you, her... Whatever - I just need a woman"". Again the tender replies ""sorry, Mac. Best I can do is Singaloo the cook…