A guy and his dog go into a bar... ...and the guy sits down at the bar. He orders a beer and drinks it, then orders another. The dog sits patiently at his feet. When it comes time for the guy to pay, he looks the barman in the eye and says, ""I'm afraid I don't have any money."" The barman is about to kick this joker's ass when the guy says, ""But I have something even better. I have a magical dog. He can talk."" This is a new one on the barman, and although he's skeptical, he decides to give the guy a chance. ""All right,"" he says, ""let's see."" The guy turns to the dog and says, ""Okay Rover, describe sandpaper."" The dog goes, ""RUFF! RUFF!"" The barman is not amused, but the guy has more in store. He looks at the dog again and says, ""Rover, what's on top of a house?"" ""ROOF! ROOF!"" ""That's it,"" says the barman. ""What do you take me for? Get the hell out of my bar."" ""Wait!"" says the guy. ""Give me one more chance, you won't be disappointed."" The barman sighs and rolls his eyes, but gestures for the man to go ahead. The guy turns to the dog and says seriously, ""Rover, it's our last chance. Do your old master proud. Now tell the man: Who was the greatest baseball player who ever lived?"" The dog wags his tail once and barks, ""RUTH! RUTH!"" It's the last straw. The barman drags the guy out the door and dumps him on the curb, with the dog following. The barman goes back into the bar, shaking his head in disgust. Rover sighs, looks at the guy and says, ""Do you think I should've said DiMaggio?""