The full time football result is in: Real Madrid - 4... Surreal Madrid - fish

What are Real Madrid fans going to do after they win the "Copa del Rey"? R : Shut down the play-station

'Appearances can be deceiving' said my fortune cookie message; then I realized I've cracked open a snail.

Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.