Bob Dylan's story about East Orange New Jersey (from his Gaslight '61 recordings). I can imagine Norm Macdonald telling this. ""First time I ever worked in East Orange New Jersey - folks, never go to East Orange New Jersey. It's a horrible town. I went there to play in a coffeehouse in East Orange New Jersey. It was a chess playing coffeehouse out there. It was so bad, uh, so bad, people playing chess out there. Uh, that's all I thought about was chess and chess and chess. People come up to me, you play a song, and play a real quiet song and in the middle of the song you hear ""check"" and ""hey they was a good move!"" and all kinds of stuff like that. And folks, it was so bad I had a little dream out there the first night I worked about this chess playing stuff. I dreamt I went to work out in East Orange New Jersey and uh by the time I quit in two days and I went there to ask the guy for my money. I says ""Can I have some money I worked two days for you"" - he says ""uh well okay we don't pay money around here though"" - and I says ""uh, yeah?"" - he says ""uh well,"" he says ""uh yeah we pay chess men."" - I said ""uh well give me my chess men then I worked two days"" - I sort of - didn't really figure - I thought he was lying at first but I took it anyway. He gave me a king and a queen for working two days. I said fine I said okay. So I took my king and queen went down to a bar. Nearest bar I could find I walked in the bar and I ordered a pint. I got in the bar. Bartender I says ""Can I have a pint?"" I'll be damned if he didn't give me a pint. He uh, asked me for the money. I gave him my king and queen. I'll be damned. He took took that king and queen, threw them under the counter and brought me out four pawns, two bishops and a rook for change. That's a story about East Orange New Jersey.""