I'm so poor I can't even pay for my own consequences.

Me: My son totaled another car. Progressive: I see that you insure 3 teen sons? M: yes P: *covers phone* HEY GUYS, WE'RE GOING TO ARUBA!

You know it's not believable when six people rob a bank in a movie if you've ever tried to organize a dinner for six people.

Tim Burton could've saved a lot of money on 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' and just shown a 2016 Facebook Year in Review instead.