Tennis Elbow A guy walks into a doctor's office. When the doctor walks in, the guy says, ""Doc, I threw my arm out playing tennis. I just need a shot of cortisone."" ""No problem,"" says the doctor, ""but first, I need to take a urine sample."" ""Why on Earth for?"" ""Well,"" the doctor explains, ""We have a new urinalysis machine that can diagnose any known ailment just from your urine. So we just need a sample."" ""I don't have to go now,"" the guy says. ""Can I bring you a sample in the morni…

This guy's wife gets a cat... This guy's wife gets a cat and he hates it. So one day, while his wife is gone to work, the guy puts the cat in the back seat of the car, drives a few blocks, and lets the cat out. When he gets home, the cat's sitting there on the front porch. So the next day, the guy waits until his wife leaves for work again, then throws the cat in the car, drives a mile away from the house, and tosses the cat out. When he gets home, the cat's sitting there again on the front porc…

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig. ""Well, whatcha' gonna do about it?"", he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears. ""Come on, man,"" the biker says, ""I didn't think you'd CRY. I can`t stand to see a man crying."" ""This is the worst day of my life,"" I say. ""I'm a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car h…

Worst day of this guy's life A man jumps in his car headed to work. Halfway there he gets in a bad crash. He's fine, but by the time he finally gets to work his boss is super pissed and fires him. The guy takes the bus home but has to walk the last mile. Tired and unhappy, he opens the door and hears what he immediately knows is the sound of love making from upstairs. He rushes up to his bedroom and finds his wife in bed with his best friend. He yells at her to get her stuff and get out. Then he…