Chaos Theory Two friends are chatting in a pub. - Have you heard that Mike died yesterday? -- Oh no! What happened to him? - He was about to pass our house driving his car when he crashed into a parking car on the side of the road, broke through the wind shield, flown through straight in our bedroom window. -- Holy c**p! What a horrible death! - No, he survived it alright. He crawled towards our wardrobe, tried to stand up grabbing the handle, but the wardrobe toppled over, and fell right …

Why didn't Leia email Obi-Wan the Death-Star plans? The Jedi Code forbids attachments.

Why did the blonde starve to death? Her new phone came with a little packet in the box that said, "Do not eat."

How do you get 1000 dead babies into a phone booth? A blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos