The Foo Bird Bob is out on the links enjoying a nice round of golf with his buddy Bill. Suddenly, on the fourth fairway, a huge bird flies overhead and drops a turd on Bob's head. ""Whatever you do, Bob,"" says Bill, ""don't wipe that turd off your head! EVER!"" ""Why not?"" asks Bob. ""I've got a huge bird turd on my head and you're saying I have to keep it on my head for the rest of my LIFE?"" ""Yes,"" says Bill. ""It's a foo bird. And you know what they say about foo birds..."" But just as Bi…

Joe went over to his buddy Bob's house to hang-out and watch football ... As they were sitting in the living room, Bob's dog walked into the room, laid down on the floor, and began to lick its nuts. Joe looked down at the dog and said ""Man, I wish I could do that."" To which Bob replied, ""Don't you think you ought to at least pet him first.""

Good news and bad news Two buddies Bob and Earl were two of the biggest baseball fans in America. Their entire adult lives, Bob and Earl discussed baseball history in the winter, and they pored over every box score during the season. They went to 60 games a year. They even agreed that whoever died first would try to come back and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven. One summer night, Bob passed away in his sleep after watching the Yankee victory earlier in the evening. He died ha…

Bob and Frank (from the other joke) escaped the cannibals and went back to their job at the Sawmill. One day Frank hears a bloodcurdling scream. He runs to Bob's station and sees that Bob has cut his arm clean off. Ever the quick thinker, Frank puts the severed arm in a zip-loc bag and rushes with Bob down to the hospital to get it re-attached. The next day, Frank goes to see how his pal is doing and finds him playing tennis. (Using a tennis racket. Not the severed arm.) "Incred…