baby moses: [crying] mum: "why wont he stop" dad: "throw him in the river lol" mum: "okay" this is from a book called the bible

The people who think Obamacare is failing thought George W. Bush was succeeding.

"Hey Steve Jobs, I'm really happy for you, And I'ma let you finish, but Moses had the greatest tablet of all time!" -Kanye

"LET MY PEEPHOLE GO!" -Moses when the cops found the peephole he installed in the Womens washroom.