Getting ready for a night out, a young woman appeared wearing a low-cut top, tight black leather mini skirt and thigh-length boots. "You look like you're going to a brothel!" scoffed her boyfriend. "Well, what if I am?" she said defiantly. He replied: "You could give me a lift." Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support and a little bit of freedom. Jerry Seinfeld
Me: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Me: When you fell from a really high distance. Dating as an atheist is hard.
Saying "oh my gosh you're getting so big!" is cute and acceptable to say to a 6 year old. Not so much to an ex-girlfriend.
When my girlfriend sends me to the supermarket to get cucumbers I also buy Vaseline so the cashier doesn't think I'm a vegan.
"No mom I DON'T HAVE a boyfriend!" -lie you tell at 18. "No mom I HAVE a boyfriend!" -lie you tell at 28.
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