#theresa

Theresa nothing worse about a breakup than your ex's name autocompleting whenever you type a word that starts with Theresa same letters

A trans woman is about to win $1,000,000 on a game show... if she can answer the final question correctly. The game show host smiles at the camera and asks, ""Alright, Theresa. What is the world's largest mammal?"" The contestant, Theresa, overcome with the excitement of winning such a large sum of cash, shouts her answer immediately: ""Elephant!"" ""Ooooooh, I'm sorry,"" says the host. ""That's incorrect."" Crestfallen at going home with no money, Theresa looks down and shakes her head and mumb…

A chemistry student was asked to explain if heaven or hell exists on a test... The question was: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate …

A Union Steward goes to a brothel . . . . . . and asks the Madam "Is this a union house?" "No it's not" she replies. "How much do the girls earn?" the union man asks. "You pay me $500, the house gets $400 and the girl gets $100" "That's crass exploitation!" the man yells and stomps out. Eventually he finds a union brothel and asks "If I give you $500, how much does the girl get?" The Madam says "She gets $400". "That's great!" the union man says. "I'd like Colleen" "I'm sure you would"…

Where do English prime-ministers take their kids on vacation? Lourdes. Mother Theresa always goes there.