An Englishman a Scotsman and an Irishman were without tickets for the opening ceremonies of the summer Olympics but hoped to be able to talk their way in at the gate. Security was very tight however and each of their attempts was met with a stern refusal. While wandering around outside the stadium the Englishman came upon construction site which gave him an idea. Grabbing a length of scaffolding he presented himself at the gate and said ""Johnson the pole vault"" and was admitted. The Scotsman …