#irving

A grasshopper walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says, ""Hey, you know we have a drink named after you?"" The grasshopper says, ""You serve a drink called Irving?""

Watching the basketball game with my dad... Me: Do you think Irving will score a three pointer in the last couple minutes? Dad: I don't know, that's quite a long shot.

Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love making with his wife was becoming routine and boring. ""Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why don't you try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That's what I do,"" said Irving. ""Sounds great,"" Morris replied, ""but how do you make it last for an hour?"" ""Just keep her in the waiting room for 55 minutes!""

At Friday night's services, Morris asks his friend Irving. "I need a favor, I'm sleeping with the Rabbi's wife. Can you hold him in synagogue for an hour after services for me?" Irving is not very fond of the idea but being Morris' life-long friend, he reluctantly agrees. After services, he strikes up a conversation with the Rabbi, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. After some time the wise Rabbi becomes suspicious and asks, "Irving what are you really up to?"…

Irving visits a nursing home Irving is a Jewish widower who is getting up in years. His family is worried it may be time for Irving to go to a nursing home. They arrange for him to spend a weekend in a nursing home to see how he adjusts to it.