I really hope I don't wake up tomorrow morning. I don't want to die, sometime in the afternoon would be nice, or even the next day

Lost my first follower today. Funeral is Tuesday. Will be live tweeting. It's what he would have wanted.

She has a coy pond. All the pretty fish swim away when you try to feed them.

Hi, I'm a high paid business consultant. I see you've named your business "Dale's Paint Supplies" but what if it was named "Best Dog Memes"