I spend more time on twitter than I do in church. I'd rather vent to imaginary friends on the Internet than to imaginary friends in the sky.
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Me: My son totaled another car. Progressive: I see that you insure 3 teen sons? M: yes P: *covers phone* HEY GUYS, WE'RE GOING TO ARUBA!
Everyone is normal until you find their Twitter.
Using my toes to pick something up makes it hard to go to church on Sunday.
It doesn't matter if I go to church or the gym as long as I can act superior later, right?
Joke ID:
01KKTNKYMQQARN7RYR4S6Z4ZYQ