I automatically write off anything Donald Trump says because someone with that much money has no excuse for that hair.

Breaking News: Reliable sources reveal that Donald Trump is actually Cthulu. The absurd hairdo isn't absurd at all. It hides the tentacles.

I think it's fair to question whether or not Barack Obama is an American. I mean, look at him. He's awfully thin...

Donald Trump was born when someone put a pinkie ring in a bag of Cheetos and left it in a lightning storm.