So my sister took her Driver's Ed test today... She thinks she failed. Part of the reason was because of this fill-in-the-blank question: *If the ______ is dead, the car won't start.* She put "driver" as her answer.

SOMEONE LEFT THEIR DOGS IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP -Ma'am, that's a pack of Ballpark All-Beef Franks. ITS 500 DEGREES IN THERE

"Is that a car alarm going off? Someone must be trying to steal it I better call the police!" - literally no one ever

Feeling sick at work. Subway to the bus-$5 Bus to commuter lot-$2 Puking in my car-$0 Guy in the car next to me puking in response-priceless