Three guys arrive at the Pearly Gates... ...(Insert your favorite racial epithets here) and encounter St. Peter. They walk towards the gate and assumed they were automatically granted admission. St. Peter stops them. St. P: Wait wait wait right there. First, you must all answer one question. What is Easter? The first guy thinks for a while: Oh, I know! Easter comes during the time of harvest, in the fall, when everyone gathers for a great feast and discuss what they're grateful for. St. P: No! That's Thanksgiving! Leave my sight at once. The second guy approaches, thinks long and hard: I know exactly what Easter means. It's during the winter and towards the end of the year. It's when people buy gifts for each other."" St. P: Of course not! How ridiculous. That's Christmas. Leave at once. The third guy is confident. Immediately he answers: Easter celebrates this man who performed miracles and spread his gospel. People persecuted him and he was sacrificed. He came back to this world from a cave. People would gather around, and if he saw his shadow, there would be 6 more weeks of winter.