Happens to all new Dads A proud new dad sits down to have a drink with his father ""Well son, now that you've got kids of your own, I think it's time I give you this"" ""Dad you don't mean..."" ""Yes son, I do"" Dad pulls out a copy of 1001 dad jokes, 5th edition ""Dad I'm honoured..."", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes. ""Hi honoured"", replies his father, ""I'm dad"".
[arcade] KID: dad, some guy is hogging the claw machine DAD: hey buddy, why don't you give the kid a turn LOBSTER: BACK OFF WE'RE IN LOVE
Mom: I think I'm gonna make a twitter Me: Mom it costs like $500 a year... Mom: That's expensive I'll stick with Facebook Me: Aww too bad
8 out of 10 men prefer not to date psychotic women with bad tempers, emotional baggage and daddy issues. To the other two.... Hi, I'm MJ
MOM STOP LICKING YOUR FINGER TO CLEAN MY FACE I'M IN A GANG NOW
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