Peg-Leg Baldy A bald man with a peg leg gets invited to a costume party. Being shy and self-conscious about his appearance he goes to the best costume shop in town. When he gets there he tells the shop owner his situation and that he would rather cover his head and leg with a costume instead instead of exploiting his apparent problems. So the shop owner comes back with a lifeguard costume. The man says ""No no. That will show off my peg leg. I can't hide it with that. Try again."" So the shop owner leaves and comes back with a monk costume And again the man says ""No no. I can't wear that. It will make people notice my head."" Obviously pissed off the shop owner leaves and comes back with a five-pound bag of caramels gives it to the man and says ""Here. Just take this."" Confused the man says ""What am I suposed to do with a bag of caramels?"" Smiling the shop owner says ""Take home this bag of caramels melt them pour it all over your body stick that peg leg up your ass and tell everyone you're a caramel apple.""