Tennis Elbow A guy walks into a doctor's office. When the doctor walks in, the guy says, ""Doc, I threw my arm out playing tennis. I just need a shot of cortisone."" ""No problem,"" says the doctor, ""but first, I need to take a urine sample."" ""Why on Earth for?"" ""Well,"" the doctor explains, ""We have a new urinalysis machine that can diagnose any known ailment just from your urine. So we just need a sample."" ""I don't have to go now,"" the guy says. ""Can I bring you a sample in the morni…

Bad News & Really Bad News A man goes to his doctors office for a follow up appt a few days after geting some lab work done. The doctor comes in and says ""I have Bad news and really bad news."" The man says ""I'll take the bad news first to which the doctor replies that the test result have come in and that he has 24 hours to live. The man is completly dumbfounded and then says ""If thats the bad news wtf is the worst news?"" The doctor replies ""Well, I forgot to call you yesterday""

The scariest thing about being a doctor is if you ever, even once, accidentally call it a "cooter" you're fired for life.

I waited for so long at the doctor's office that by the time they called me it was time for my follow-up appointment.