[covered in olive oil, salt, pepper and other herbs and spices] Professor: "That's just not what I meant when I said "come prepared"..."

Maybe Taylor Swfit dates Justin Bieber and John Mayer dates Selena Gomez and it's like matter/anti-matter and they all explode?

In America she's called "Miley" Cyrus, but in other countries she's called "What America would be like if it were a person".

9: My teacher doesn't wear makeup like you do. I guess she doesn't need it because she's younger. Me: Get out of the car.