Patient (to cosmetic surgeon): “Will it hurt me, doctor?” Surgeon: “Only when you get my bill, Mrs. Brown!”#Mrs Brown#Doctor#One-Liner0🔗 Share
ME: my therapist told me to stop talking about people as if they weren't here THERAPIST: [rubbing temples] i know#Doctor#One-Liner0🔗 SharePermalink →
THERAPIST: what's the problem? WIFE: he replaces words with animal names just to annoy me ME: I don't do it on porpoise#Marriage#Doctor#One-Liner0🔗 SharePermalink →
PIG: "I'm paranoid everyone's trying to turn me into bacon" PSYCHIATRIST: "I'll cure you" PIG: "Oh God, not you too"#Animals#Doctor#One-Liner0🔗 SharePermalink →
Therapist has suggested yoga, for a calming, alternate state of consciousness. But its to much easier just to drink.#Doctor#One-Liner0🔗 SharePermalink →