Maybe the cost of a barrel of oil wouldn't be so expensive if Donkey Kong didn't waste thousands of them in the '80s throwing them at Mario.

I didn't get far in Mario. I thought the guy floating on the cloud was God so I just accepted it when he threw shit at me

I don't play mario kart with my brother anymore. Because we are both in our 20's & my mom is not there to split us up when we fight.

[dinner party] mario: what's in this risotto? me: mushroom, you're not allergic? mario: *grows to like 20 feet*