My main goal in life is to become a cooking show judge Mostly because I like to criticize people while I eat

what does the Bible say about faking your own death to get out of jury duty

You young couples with your dogs, your trial children, you'll learn nothing about parenting because you can never teach a toddler to "sit".

I hate snakes because they have no feet. You could say I'm... lacktoes intolerant *opens another beer*