Two dogs are sitting next to each other in a veterinarian's office... One of the dogs looks at the other. ""So, what are you here for?""   The other dog looks back. ""Well, I guess I have nothing left to lose. I...Well, two days ago, I relieved myself in my master's shoes. When he punished me for it, I chewed his favorite bathrobe to shreds. And....well...now, here I am, waiting to be put down."" The dog falls silent for a moment. ""I...I guess I deserve it. I did do a lot of damage.""   The first dog looks at the second. ""Really? They're putting you down for that? I'm here to get put down because I bit my master's child. I was nice and relaxed, enjoying my rawhide chew, when this little brat came up and grabbed it away. So, like any self-respecting dog, I nipped her. Next thing I know, she's screaming, her mother is crying, and my master is beating me with a belt. Now, here I am, waiting to be put down.""   The two dogs sit together in companionable silence, until a third dog is led in. He sits beside the other two, straight-backed and stoic.   The first dog looks at him. ""So, what did you do?"" The third dog looks back. ""Well...I'm ashamed to say it, but....My master had just gotten out of the shower. She had her towel around her, but it got snagged on the toilet paper holder, and fell off. She turned around, bent over to pick it up....and I couldn't help myself. I mounted her and took her like an animal.""   The first two dogs looked at each other, then back at the third dog. ""Wow..."" the first dog said. ""Out of all of us here to be put down...I think you deserve it the most.""   The third dog looked back at the other two, shocked. ""Put down?!"" he exclaimed. ""I'm just here for a nail trimming!""