Bear Attack An elderly man visits his doctor one day. ""I have some exciting news, Doctor!"", exclaimed man, with excitement. ""What is it?"", asked his doctor. ""My wife took a pregnancy test last week and, well.. we're expecting a child! Isn't it great!?"" ""What!?"", expressed the doctor, in confusion. ""But your wife is only 32, and you're almost 70!"" ""So? What does age matter when there is love between man and his wife?"", he said, clearly disappointed and displeased with the doctor's skeptical response. ""Besides, I am fully capable of bearing a child, despite my age!"" The doctor thought for a moment before responding to the man's abrupt and defensive tone. ""Well, let me tell you something curious that happened to me the other day."", he said. ""Alright, go on."", responded the old man. ""The rain had just fallen, and I decided that I should take a walk out in the forest like I usually do, what with the air being so clean and the weather being so clear."", began the doctor. ""Everything was fine until about an hour into my walk, when I began to hear heavy breathing and rustling of leaves about ten yards ahead of me. Frightened and unsure, I looked around worriedly at my surroundings. In the following moments, from behind a large tree, a black bear emerged!"" ""What!? What did you do then?"", asked the man, now very engaged in the doctor's story. ""Well, there wasn't much that I could do!"", explained the doctor. ""I stumbled about for a moment, trying to find something to defend myself with, but by this time the bear had already noticed me.."" He paused for a short moment. ""Well, then what?"", interjected the man impatiently. ""I remembered that I had taken my umbrella with me, and as I got it out the bear arose on its two hind feet and roared at me! As I calibrated the umbrella in its direction and pushed it open, the booming sound of a gunshot surrounded the forest and everything in it. Miraculously, my umbrella had fired at this bear, and it laid there, lifeless, in front of me!"" The old man looked at the doctor for a moment, and then broke out in a cry of laughter. ""Ha! Are you mad!? That's nonsense!"", said the man with a smug and clever expression upon his face. ""How could your umbrella shoot at that bear? Surely someone else shot it with a rifle at the same moment that you aimed your umbrella!"" ""Yeah..."", responded the doctor. ""You're probably right.""