Sir, why do you ask for a red shirt before battle? In the days when tall wooden ships sailed the high seas, there was this one ship sailing during a war. That morning, the lookout shouted, ""Enemy ship on the horizon."" The captain said to his ensign, ""Get me my red shirt."" The ensign, rather bewildered by this odd request, did as his captain ordered. Though the battle was a long one, the captain and his crew managed to fend off the enemy ship. Later that day, the lookout shouted, ""Two enemy ships on the horizon."" As before, the captain said to his ensign, ""Get me my red shirt."" And, as before, the ensign did as his captain asked. The battle took the rest of the day to fight, and again they managed to defeat the two enemy ships. That evening, the ensign asked his captain, ""Sir, why, before every battle, do you ask for your red shirt?"" The captain replied, ""Well, if I am wounded in battle, the blood will not show and the crew will continue to fight."" The crew was listening, and they were impressed. They had a brave captain. The next morning, the lookout shouted, ""Ten enemy ships on the horizon."" The ensign looked at his captain, waiting for the usual orders. The captain said to his ensign, ""Ensign, get me my brown pants.""