Jay-Z puts down his phone and rolls his eyes. "The wife." "I hear that!" says Kanye, trying do the same but accidentally going cross-eyed.

If Jay-Z is married to Beyonce and is a multimillionaire and still has 99 problems then there ain't no hope for the rest of us

Beyonce: I cannot wait to slum it with some earth mortals at - wait what is it called again? Jay-Z: Coachella. Beyonce: Coachella.

The first of Jay-Z's 99 problems is the obsessive compulsive disorder that requires him to know his precise number of problems at all times.