For parents, college is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you or they'll send your kid back.

-Come on, it's time to go -No -We are going to be late -I hate school -But Mum, you have to take me!

Bought 17 a fanny pack for back to school to delay my becoming a grandfather too early.

Your volume level is at a flamboyantly gay band geek and I need you to turn it down to a shy Asian transfer student.