Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. Wife: You wear briefs, don't you 1486. Wife: What do you mean by coming home half drunk? Husband: It's not my fault.. I ran out of money. 1487. Harold's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asked, "Darling, honestly, what age would you say I am?" Looking over her carefully, Harold replied, "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. "Hey, wait a minute!" Harold interrupted. "I haven't added them up yet."